If you know your reasons why you do what you do, then now you know when to add your replacement to your plan. Replacements are the things you will do instead of the thing you used to do. Like I mentioned before, goals where the goal is a negative direction away from something are hard. One reason is the “why”. The reasons why do not go away just because we are not going to fill those reasons with something the way we used to fill it. Like if I swear when I am angry, and I want to stop swearing when I am angry. I will not be able to stop being angry 100% of the time, so what will I do when I am angry? If my goal stops at just not swearing, I am likely to keep swearing. If I have a replacement for swearing, then I might do that instead.
Bottom line, when you remove something from your life that has been working for you, a habit, a way of dressing, spending, eating, communicating, moving etc., you have to replace it with something else or their will be a void where the item was. That void will gnaw at you begging to be filled by something, and if you do not have a plan to fill it, you will go back to what you used to use to fill it. If you want to quit gambling, you need a plan for what to do when you used to want to gamble. Same goes for quitting smoking or drinking etc. You need a replacement. This takes effort and focus on something new.
For my ice cream habit, I added a replacement. I like creamy sweet with crunchy stuff. People have suggested frozen yogurt instead. News flash, frozen yogurt has a ton of sugar too. It has less fat than ice cream, but often replaces that fat with sugar, so that is not an option for me. Things like sherbet are full of sugars too. That wasn’t want I was looking for. I needed something that was similar to what I like.
My plan was to eat yogurt instead. I like yogurt of all kinds, so I didn’t have to worry about trying to like it, I just needed to find ones with lower sugar so I wasn’t just replacing ice cream with a ton of sugar with yogurt with a ton of sugar. I had to read labels. Greek yogurt tends to have less sugar and more protein, so I mostly ate those. I do like one particular yogurt that has some creamy goodness and sugar, but not a ton of it, so smaller amounts of that one would also work. I also like crunchy things in my ice cream, so I purchased unsalted nuts and coco dusted almonds (If you are also looking for a different sweet treat, be careful with these. There are some of them that are covered in melted chocolate then dusted with coco powder, and called coco dusted. I bought the ones that only have the dusting of coco on them and not much added sugar at all) and mixed them together for a slightly sweet nut mix. When I wanted ice cream or any sugary treat at home, I would eat the yogurt and nuts instead. It worked well during the first phase of no ice cream on Fridays, so it should work well for this no ice cream at home alone phase too.
For you, consider your replacement. If your goal is a not do, eat, smoke, wear, go, think etc., something, then what will you do instead of that when you want to do that. Mine sounded like, I will eat yogurt and my nut mix when I want to eat ice cream. What does yours sound like?
Meditation Mantra: Say your statement of replacement after your goal statement. Example: “I will only eat ice cream when out with friends. If I want to eat ice cream at home when I am alone, I will eat yogurt and nuts. Again you are changing your brain grooves and patterns. “If you take it a step further and visualize yourself eating the yogurt or doing the replacement thing instead of the old thing, that will also help. If you have clear ideas about your reasons why, you can also add that in. “When I am feeling sad and want to eat ice cream, I will eat yogurt and nuts instead.”