Letting Go of Self

An important piece of letting go of attachment is letting go of the idea of self. You are both nothing and everything. When we become attached to who we think we are, who we think we should be or who we want to be, we miss opportunities to be our true selves. Our true selves are who we are when we strip away the thoughts and attachments of who we think we are, and just trust ourselves to just be in our natural state. In our natural state, our higher self can come through and support us to be our best self. When we get attached to ideas and thoughts about ourselves, they can interfere with our ability to listen to our higher self who is trying to support us to be who we are meant to be.

One way people try to become better humans is to set goals and create visions of who they want to be. They may do that in their minds, in a journal, lists or a poster with pictures and drawings. When we set those intentions, we also get attached to them, especially on paper, we can potentially close off the opportunities to become who we are meant to be. On the other hand if we set the intention to be our best self, but leave open what that might look like and just focus on being present and listening to what’s next for us in this moment, we then have the opportunity to truly become our best selves.

Another way is to focus on believing that you are who you are supposed to be already. That your only purpose is to be who you are, not strive or have goals to be different, just be who you are now. That person that you are right now, in this moment, is perfectly suited to your purpose for this moment. In the next moment, that might shift, and then in that moment you will receive information about how to do that. If you are not attached to a plan or place to go and are able to just sit in that moment and listen to your higher self, you will hear what’s next. Your higher self knows who you chose to be and are intended to be. Listening requires letting go.

This exercise is about letting go of your ideas of self.

1. Fold your paper into three sections.
2. In each section make a list.
3. Section 1, write down who you think you are.
4. Section 2, write down who you think you should be.
5. Section 3, write down who you want to be.
6. Decorate and make your lists pretty or as complete as you can.
7. Take the paper or papers and either tear them up or burn them. Burning is a more permanent visual representation, which might stick better.
8. Sit quietly and close your eyes. Bring the ideas on the papers into your mind, and then actively watch them disappear. If you burned them, imagine them going up in smoke. If you tore them, imagine the garbage man taking them away.
9. Once the ideas are gone vision space, just blank open space. Maybe it is dark, maybe you see a piece of white paper. Whatever open space looks like is fine.
10. Focus on the blank space, but keep your mind flexible. Don’t try to force something onto the page or into the space. Also don’t focus on pushing things out of the space. Ask, “What’s next?” Then just listen.
11. If something floats in, let it be there. Don’t attach to it as the “thing” you were waiting for, just let it be.
12. If the idea or image persists, and it is an action, try doing it. See what happens.
13. If the idea or image is just a thought about something rather than something to do. Don’t attach to it, just let it be and imagine it being completely free to come or go. See what happens. If it persists, then that might be true for this moment. Always remember that true for this moment is only for this moment. Do not attach to it being true forever.
14. When you feel ready, open your eyes and move, just move toward whatever seems important right now.
15. As you move through your life, just keep listening to what is next and move toward that. Be open to that changing frequently. Just do what is next.

Keep in mind that what’s next might be a plan for your future. It is not bad to have a retirement account or plan for your future. It is also not a problem to dip into that retirement account to buy a new home, or start up a business if that is what you are being told to do. You might have been led to start the retirement so that you could start that business, have a home in a certain place, take an important vacation where something important to you or someone else might happen. Thing is, it’s not bad to make a plan for the future, even if it is tomorrow. I have a calendar with meetings and things to do. I am also not attached to it, well mostly I’m not. I do find that attached or not, sometimes plans have to change. If I am feeling attached, and plans change, I am usually unhappy. If plans change, and I am not attached, I go with it, and often, something amazing happens. By being attached to things, we can miss other things that might be better, more awesome, or a really great opportunity to learn. Trust the universe. You know your big picture plan. Listen to yourself. You will tell you what to do. You will tell you what to do next.